BREAKING NEWS: TOP TEN WAYS TO TIRE OUT CHILDREN IN PRIMARY
by Bettyanne Bruin
Guaranteed to make children sit through all of Sharing Time, here are the top ten suggestions on how to help tire out children in Primary:
1 - Have children sing and do the actions for "Once There Was a Snowman," ten times.
2 - Have children sing and do the actions for "Do as I'm Doing," ten times.
3 - Have children sing and do the actions for "Fun to Do," ten times.
4 - Have children sing and do the actions for "Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes" ten times.
5 - Have children sing and do the actions for, "Popcorn Popping on the Apricot Tree," ten times.
6 - Have children sing and raise their scriptures in the air each time the word "scripture" is said during the song, "Scripture Power," and sing ten times.
7 - Have children sing and do all the actions for, "Book of Mormon Stories" and sing ten times.
8 - Even though they're not supposed to do this anymore, have the children sing and stand each time they say the word "sunbeam" in the song, "Jesus Wants Me For a Sunbeam," and do this ten times.
9 - Have children sing and stand each time they say hello in the "Hello Song," and sing song ten times.
10 - Have children sing and march all around the room while singing, "Follow the Prophet," ten times.
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
Monday, October 29, 2007
BREAKING NEWS: TOP TEN LDS COSTUME IDEAS FOR HALLOWEEN
Monday, October 29, 2007
BREAKING NEWS: TOP TEN LDS COSTUME IDEAS FOR HALLOWEEN
TOP TEN LDS COSTUME IDEAS FOR HALLOWEENby
Bettyanne Bruin
1 - Sick nursery kid (don't forget the runny nose!)
2 - Scout after falling off the stage at a scouting activity
3 - Home Teacher (stays home instead of going Trick or Treating)
4 - Mother after saying goodbye to her missionary at the MTC
5 - Young woman after girl's camp (don't forget the campfire scent)
6 - Member of the church after stuffing himself the Saturday night before Fast Sunday
7 - A dead ancestor
8 - Mother with a Monday morning LDS hangover
9 - Father on the night of his 16-year-old daughter's first date
10 - Emergency preparedness specialist (don't forget the bird flu mask)
Monday, July 09, 2007
Breaking News: Top Ten Talks That Should Never Be Given
Breaking News: Top Ten Talk that Should Never be Given
by Bettyanne Bruin
I was once in a ward where a man gave a talk on empathizing with Satan. I don't recall there ever being a quieter chapel, as everyone sat there... stunned. His talk include such ideas as, poor, poor Satan, that it must have been so hard for him to fight against the plan, what it might have been that was really bothering him and how we should have empathy for ALL of our brothers and sisters, including Satan. This has prompted the following list:
Top Ten Other Talks that Should Never be Given in Church:
1 - Can Tobacco Be All Bad if it Has Medicinal Purposes?
2 - The Pros and cons of paying tithing
3 - Because I have enough faith, I will never need anti-anxiety medications
4 - I Lost 100 Pounds Drinking Coca Cola
5 - In lieu of testimony, playing an Oakrigdge Boys song (this actually happened in a ward I was in also)
6 - Expressing gratitude for extended life after suffering a brain aneurysm while have intimate relations with spouse (this was also true in the same ward) and he explained in detail how this happened. I covered the ears of the child next to me!
7 - After Reading all of Isaiah, I Believe I Know the actual day the Second Coming will Arrive
8 - I Never Do My Home Teaching and Yet I Still Feel Blessed
9 - Because I got my husband sent home from his mission, he got a great job he would have missed out on
10 - How Spending So Much on Food STorage made us lose our home.
by Bettyanne Bruin
I was once in a ward where a man gave a talk on empathizing with Satan. I don't recall there ever being a quieter chapel, as everyone sat there... stunned. His talk include such ideas as, poor, poor Satan, that it must have been so hard for him to fight against the plan, what it might have been that was really bothering him and how we should have empathy for ALL of our brothers and sisters, including Satan. This has prompted the following list:
Top Ten Other Talks that Should Never be Given in Church:
1 - Can Tobacco Be All Bad if it Has Medicinal Purposes?
2 - The Pros and cons of paying tithing
3 - Because I have enough faith, I will never need anti-anxiety medications
4 - I Lost 100 Pounds Drinking Coca Cola
5 - In lieu of testimony, playing an Oakrigdge Boys song (this actually happened in a ward I was in also)
6 - Expressing gratitude for extended life after suffering a brain aneurysm while have intimate relations with spouse (this was also true in the same ward) and he explained in detail how this happened. I covered the ears of the child next to me!
7 - After Reading all of Isaiah, I Believe I Know the actual day the Second Coming will Arrive
8 - I Never Do My Home Teaching and Yet I Still Feel Blessed
9 - Because I got my husband sent home from his mission, he got a great job he would have missed out on
10 - How Spending So Much on Food STorage made us lose our home.
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
BREAKING NEWS: HJB IS BACK!!!
BREAKING NEWS: HJB IS BACK!!!
by Bettyanne Bruin
KKK. Oops. I should probably just say, K,K. I have been swamped, but I've had a blast. I've been working, fulfilling some media relations obligations with a few film companies:
Believe, a movie that is a spoof on multi-level marketing. This is NOT a MLM bashing movie, but a "Let's have a good laugh at ourselves," film. I think Loki Mulholland did a great job on this film and was a super guy to work with.
I'm also having fun working with Chris Heimerdinger on Passage to Zarahemla, another film that I think was done very well, has a great adventure and provides an interesting, entertaining story line about the Book of Mormon. Has a great super effects guy: Steve Sobisky, who worked on Shrek, ANTZ and other movies as a member of the DreamTeam. He is fantastic! And Bruce Wing, the props guy who collects incredible props, Shari Ohman who has done costuming for countless Church-produced films and other LDS and non-LDS films, the wonderfully talented Summer Naomi Smart, Alex Petrovitch, Brian Kary, the list goes on and on. Today, I spoke with Bryce Chamberlain, who played the father in Man's Search for Happiness and now plays the grandfather in Passage to Zarahemla. That was awesome!!! Who would have thought, when I was sixteen and so affected by that film that it changed my life (cheesy, but true) that today I would have the privilege of personally thanking him.
I'm also working with Kieth Merrill and Peter Rancie's new studio, AAMPS, otherwise known as Audience Alliance Motion Picture Studios. Wow, what an experience this has been as well. All I can say is, there is SO MUCH TALENT in the LDS community !!! I have truly felt in awe of these people. They are all incredible. Kieth is so awesome and such a gentleman and a gentle man. Peter is so great. I love his g'days (he's from Australia) and he's a real mover and a shaker and has a determined focus on using his time and energy to give back to the community what he believes the community is seeking: movies that are high quality and filled with moral integrity. Way to go, Peter!
I am also a correspondent for the Salt Lake Tribune's Close-up section, an online editor for Writer's Literary, a freelance writer for Utah Spirit magazine, a Mia Maid Advisor, a vacationeer, a lover of fun and variety, a David Letterman addict, and a collector of strange LDS happenings, sightings, stories, happenings, etc. because I LOVE our community; the uniqueness, the insanity, the charity, the ups and the downs, the famous, the not-so-famous, etc.
So, here goes:
Possibly the Only Top Ten Strange Things That Could Only Happen in Utah: (Unless YOU have some!!!)
1 - A bumper sticker on a car in Provo with a picture of the Salt Lake Temple on it and the words: I am always worthy.
2 - A woman on the local news who gave the local traffic report, then accidentally closed her on-air, live report, "In the name of...." (I think you can find this on YouTube.)
3 - A sacrament meeting where a man played, "Oh My Father," on his saw. (I think the Church came out with stricter guidelines the next week for Sacrament meeting musical contributions.)
4 - A man (many might know) who thought it would be a great attention getter to yell really loud as the introduction to his Sacrament Meeting talk and, in so doing, made a young girl seated in the middle of the chapel throw up. (And seeing everyone scramble to help clean up the mess, while the man, not knowing what happened, continued on with his talk.)
5 - Walking into the chapel for the Children's Sacrament Meeting and seeing two seven-year-old boys standing next to the pulpit choking each other and learning one of them was my son.
6 - In the Summer, the people standing in line for a snow cone at a snow cone booth is longer than the lines waiting to get a drink at a bar. (My non-LDS brother, from California, could not believe this!)
7 - The signs posted on homes throughout Utah that read, "Welcome Home Elder." (Or Sister)
8 - That the candy aisle fills a complete aisle and the beer covers a small corner, where in California, it is totally the opposite.
9 - One of my favorites: Seeing families picnicking on top of graves while children run around and play, and cars create traffic jams in all of the cemeteries on Memorial Day
10 - A school bus filled with children singing Popcorn Popping on the Apricot Tree during a school field trip (even the teachers were singing). This just happened last week.
Crazy.
Feel free to comment with your own sightings.
by Bettyanne Bruin
KKK. Oops. I should probably just say, K,K. I have been swamped, but I've had a blast. I've been working, fulfilling some media relations obligations with a few film companies:
Believe, a movie that is a spoof on multi-level marketing. This is NOT a MLM bashing movie, but a "Let's have a good laugh at ourselves," film. I think Loki Mulholland did a great job on this film and was a super guy to work with.
I'm also having fun working with Chris Heimerdinger on Passage to Zarahemla, another film that I think was done very well, has a great adventure and provides an interesting, entertaining story line about the Book of Mormon. Has a great super effects guy: Steve Sobisky, who worked on Shrek, ANTZ and other movies as a member of the DreamTeam. He is fantastic! And Bruce Wing, the props guy who collects incredible props, Shari Ohman who has done costuming for countless Church-produced films and other LDS and non-LDS films, the wonderfully talented Summer Naomi Smart, Alex Petrovitch, Brian Kary, the list goes on and on. Today, I spoke with Bryce Chamberlain, who played the father in Man's Search for Happiness and now plays the grandfather in Passage to Zarahemla. That was awesome!!! Who would have thought, when I was sixteen and so affected by that film that it changed my life (cheesy, but true) that today I would have the privilege of personally thanking him.
I'm also working with Kieth Merrill and Peter Rancie's new studio, AAMPS, otherwise known as Audience Alliance Motion Picture Studios. Wow, what an experience this has been as well. All I can say is, there is SO MUCH TALENT in the LDS community !!! I have truly felt in awe of these people. They are all incredible. Kieth is so awesome and such a gentleman and a gentle man. Peter is so great. I love his g'days (he's from Australia) and he's a real mover and a shaker and has a determined focus on using his time and energy to give back to the community what he believes the community is seeking: movies that are high quality and filled with moral integrity. Way to go, Peter!
I am also a correspondent for the Salt Lake Tribune's Close-up section, an online editor for Writer's Literary, a freelance writer for Utah Spirit magazine, a Mia Maid Advisor, a vacationeer, a lover of fun and variety, a David Letterman addict, and a collector of strange LDS happenings, sightings, stories, happenings, etc. because I LOVE our community; the uniqueness, the insanity, the charity, the ups and the downs, the famous, the not-so-famous, etc.
So, here goes:
Possibly the Only Top Ten Strange Things That Could Only Happen in Utah: (Unless YOU have some!!!)
1 - A bumper sticker on a car in Provo with a picture of the Salt Lake Temple on it and the words: I am always worthy.
2 - A woman on the local news who gave the local traffic report, then accidentally closed her on-air, live report, "In the name of...." (I think you can find this on YouTube.)
3 - A sacrament meeting where a man played, "Oh My Father," on his saw. (I think the Church came out with stricter guidelines the next week for Sacrament meeting musical contributions.)
4 - A man (many might know) who thought it would be a great attention getter to yell really loud as the introduction to his Sacrament Meeting talk and, in so doing, made a young girl seated in the middle of the chapel throw up. (And seeing everyone scramble to help clean up the mess, while the man, not knowing what happened, continued on with his talk.)
5 - Walking into the chapel for the Children's Sacrament Meeting and seeing two seven-year-old boys standing next to the pulpit choking each other and learning one of them was my son.
6 - In the Summer, the people standing in line for a snow cone at a snow cone booth is longer than the lines waiting to get a drink at a bar. (My non-LDS brother, from California, could not believe this!)
7 - The signs posted on homes throughout Utah that read, "Welcome Home Elder." (Or Sister)
8 - That the candy aisle fills a complete aisle and the beer covers a small corner, where in California, it is totally the opposite.
9 - One of my favorites: Seeing families picnicking on top of graves while children run around and play, and cars create traffic jams in all of the cemeteries on Memorial Day
10 - A school bus filled with children singing Popcorn Popping on the Apricot Tree during a school field trip (even the teachers were singing). This just happened last week.
Crazy.
Feel free to comment with your own sightings.
Monday, April 02, 2007
BREAKING NEWS: TOP TEN SIDE EFFECTS FROM WATCHING GENERAL CONFERENCE
BREAKING NEWS:
TOP TEN SIDE EFFECTS
FROM WATCHING GENERAL CONFERENCE:
By Bettyanne Bruin
1 -Weight gain from eating so many snacks and family meals.
2 - Sensitive eyes from spending so much time watching television.
3 - Paper cuts from too much scrapbooking while watching GC.
4 - Tired arms from playing too many hand held video games.
5 - Marital distress because women in the family spent
too much money at Deseret Book
while men were at priesthood meeting.
6 - Leftover aggravation from spending two whole days with family.
7 - Numb backsides from sitting for so long.
8 - Bruises from family dog pile.
9 - Aching legs from lack of walking around for two days straight.
10 - Guilt from already having broken commitment
to cut down on swearing and forgiving others more.
TOP TEN SIDE EFFECTS
FROM WATCHING GENERAL CONFERENCE:
By Bettyanne Bruin
1 -Weight gain from eating so many snacks and family meals.
2 - Sensitive eyes from spending so much time watching television.
3 - Paper cuts from too much scrapbooking while watching GC.
4 - Tired arms from playing too many hand held video games.
5 - Marital distress because women in the family spent
too much money at Deseret Book
while men were at priesthood meeting.
6 - Leftover aggravation from spending two whole days with family.
7 - Numb backsides from sitting for so long.
8 - Bruises from family dog pile.
9 - Aching legs from lack of walking around for two days straight.
10 - Guilt from already having broken commitment
to cut down on swearing and forgiving others more.
Friday, March 23, 2007
BREAKING NEWS: TOP TEN NEW LDS TAX WRITE-OFFS
BREAKING NEWS: TOP TEN NEW LDS TAX WRITE-OFFS
by
Bettyanne Bruin
1 - Weddings!
2 - Visual aids
3 - Handouts
4 - Food eaten while listening to/watching
General Conference
5 - Food eaten at restaurants in
conjunction with Fast Sunday
6 - BYU sports paraphernalia
7 - Baby shower gifts
8 - Scrapbooking supplies
9 - Mileage to and from all church
activities and meetings
10 - Expenses surrounding mission
farewells: food, new carpet, new
clothes, manicures
(I thought you might want to, finally, see a
photo of my husband and me!)
Friday, March 16, 2007
BREAKING NEWS: TOP TEN LDS SAINTS
In honor of St. Patty's Day (our family's favorite holiday -- go corned beef!) :
TOP TEN SAINTS IN THE LDS CHURCH
by Bettyanne Bruin
1 - Saint Coke
2 - Saint Pepsi
3 - Saint Hershey
4 - Saint Creative Keepsakes
5 - Saint Refillable cups/Big Gulp
6 - Saint Hometown Buffet
7 - Saint Costco
8 - Saint Wendover
9 - Saint Funeral Potatoes
10 - Saint Fry Sauce
by Bettyanne Bruin
1 - Saint Coke
2 - Saint Pepsi
3 - Saint Hershey
4 - Saint Creative Keepsakes
5 - Saint Refillable cups/Big Gulp
6 - Saint Hometown Buffet
7 - Saint Costco
8 - Saint Wendover
9 - Saint Funeral Potatoes
10 - Saint Fry Sauce
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
BREAKING NEWS: HI MIA MAIDS
Top Ten Things That Young Women Love to Talk About
1 - Boys
2 - Righteous Boys
3 - Righteous Handsome Boys
4 - Righteous Handsome Intelligent Boys
5 - Is there such a thing as Righteous Handsome Intelligent Boys
6 - Chivalrous boys
7 - Humble boys
8 - Is there such a thing as humble boys
9 - Where have all the good boys gone?
10 - Chocolate muffins
Monday, February 19, 2007
BREAKING NEWS: TOP TEN WAYS TO PROMOTE GOOD SPORTMANSHIP AMONGST LDS BASKETBALL PLAYERS
TOP TEN WAYS TO PROMOTE
GOOD SPORTMANSHIP
AMONGST LDS BASKETBALL PLAYERS
by Bettyanne Bruin
GOOD SPORTMANSHIP
AMONGST LDS BASKETBALL PLAYERS
by Bettyanne Bruin
1 -
Have an opening prayer.
2 -
Post a religious picture.
3 -
Have a referee say, "Keep it clean."
4 -
Have opposing players shake hands.
5 -
Post a smiley face above basketball hoops.
6 -
Read the 13th Article of Faith.
7 -
Have a moment of silence
with emphasis on
visualizing good behavior.
8 - Spotlight players to
bring out positive attributes.
9 - Serve refreshments.
10 - Hire a cop to read
the statute on
assault and battery.
Have an opening prayer.
2 -
Post a religious picture.
3 -
Have a referee say, "Keep it clean."
4 -
Have opposing players shake hands.
5 -
Post a smiley face above basketball hoops.
6 -
Read the 13th Article of Faith.
7 -
Have a moment of silence
with emphasis on
visualizing good behavior.
8 - Spotlight players to
bring out positive attributes.
9 - Serve refreshments.
10 - Hire a cop to read
the statute on
assault and battery.
Monday, February 12, 2007
BREAKING NEWS: TOP TEN THINGS THAT CAN BE MADE FROM A SACRAMENT MEETING PROGRAM
BREAKING NEWS: TOP TEN THINGS
THAT CAN BE MADE FROM
A SACRAMENT MEETING PROGRAM :
By Bettyanne Bruin
THAT CAN BE MADE FROM
A SACRAMENT MEETING PROGRAM :
By Bettyanne Bruin
1
Paper airplane
2
Cootie catcher
3
Drinking cup
4
Paper football
5
Bird
6 Hat
7
Bracelet
8
Fan
9
Horn
10
Confetti
Paper airplane
2
Cootie catcher
3
Drinking cup
4
Paper football
5
Bird
6 Hat
7
Bracelet
8
Fan
9
Horn
10
Confetti
Monday, January 29, 2007
BREAKING NEWS: TOP TEN SIGNS OF A LDS MONDAY MORNING HANGOVER
BREAKING NEWS: TOP TEN SIGNS OF A
LDS MONDAY MORNING HANGOVER
by
Bettyanne Bruin
LDS MONDAY MORNING HANGOVER
by
Bettyanne Bruin
1 - EYES:
Swollen from too much napping.
2 - BACK:
Painful from too much time spent
laying on the couch.
3 - NECK:
Stiff from awkward sleeping position
in Sacrament Meeting.
4 - ANKLES:
Swollen from sitting for three hours straight.
5 - STOMACH:
Queezy from too many layers of junk food.
6 - HEAD:
Aches from too many hours spent with
immediate and extended family.
7 - MOUTH:
Hurts from too much smiling.
8 - BRAIN:
Cramped out of restraint from
expressing true feelings.
9 - THROAT:
Sore from yelling at everyone to be quiet
so TV can be heard.
10 - EARS
Tired from having to listen
to so many people talk
about stuff that's actually
not all that interesting.
Swollen from too much napping.
2 - BACK:
Painful from too much time spent
laying on the couch.
3 - NECK:
Stiff from awkward sleeping position
in Sacrament Meeting.
4 - ANKLES:
Swollen from sitting for three hours straight.
5 - STOMACH:
Queezy from too many layers of junk food.
6 - HEAD:
Aches from too many hours spent with
immediate and extended family.
7 - MOUTH:
Hurts from too much smiling.
8 - BRAIN:
Cramped out of restraint from
expressing true feelings.
9 - THROAT:
Sore from yelling at everyone to be quiet
so TV can be heard.
10 - EARS
Tired from having to listen
to so many people talk
about stuff that's actually
not all that interesting.
Wednesday, January 24, 2007
DEATHLY BREAKING NEWS: TOP TEN FAVORITE GENEAOLOGIST SAYINGS
DEATHLY BREAKING NEWS:
TOP TEN FAVORITE
GENEALOGIST SAYINGS
by
Bettyanne Bruin
TOP TEN FAVORITE
GENEALOGIST SAYINGS
by
Bettyanne Bruin
1 -
Over all of your ancestor's dead bodies!
2 -
What the endless freakin'
research are you doing?
3 -
If your great, great, great, great
grandmother heard that, she'd...!
4 -
I'll bet your great, great, great, great
grandfather just rolled over in his grave!
5 -
That's about as believable as
somebody findin' the 1890 census!
6 -
Somebody ought to take that family chain and ...!
7 -
You think that's hard,
you should try finding your Great, Great Uncle Charlie
in the entire state of Tennessee.
8 -
That is more "out there" than
discovering your great grandfather was a medicine man!
9 -
Stop beatin' everything to death!
10 -
It's not like it's the end of the world!
Over all of your ancestor's dead bodies!
2 -
What the endless freakin'
research are you doing?
3 -
If your great, great, great, great
grandmother heard that, she'd...!
4 -
I'll bet your great, great, great, great
grandfather just rolled over in his grave!
5 -
That's about as believable as
somebody findin' the 1890 census!
6 -
Somebody ought to take that family chain and ...!
7 -
You think that's hard,
you should try finding your Great, Great Uncle Charlie
in the entire state of Tennessee.
8 -
That is more "out there" than
discovering your great grandfather was a medicine man!
9 -
Stop beatin' everything to death!
10 -
It's not like it's the end of the world!
Monday, January 22, 2007
BREAKING NEWS: TOP TEN GOOD THINGS ABOUT THE EARLY TO THE LATE SCHEDULE
BREAKING NEWS: TOP TEN GOOD THINGS
ABOUT THE LATE SCHEDULE
by
Bettyanne Bruin
ABOUT THE LATE SCHEDULE
by
Bettyanne Bruin
1 -
You get to sleep in.
2 -
You get to stay in your pajamas until 1 p.m.
3 -
Because Mormons tend to sin more as the Sabbath Day wears on,
there's less opportunity to sin.
4 -
You can go into a deeper sleep during Sacrament meeting.
5 -
You can go into a deeper a nap during Sunday School.
6 -
You can go into a deeper nap during the third hour.
7 -
It's warmer out in the winter.
8 -
You get to sit in an air conditioned building
during the summer.
9 -
The most boring part of the Sunday TV schedule
is during your church time.
10 -
You look more relaxed than the
early schedule people who are leaving the building.
You get to sleep in.
2 -
You get to stay in your pajamas until 1 p.m.
3 -
Because Mormons tend to sin more as the Sabbath Day wears on,
there's less opportunity to sin.
4 -
You can go into a deeper sleep during Sacrament meeting.
5 -
You can go into a deeper a nap during Sunday School.
6 -
You can go into a deeper nap during the third hour.
7 -
It's warmer out in the winter.
8 -
You get to sit in an air conditioned building
during the summer.
9 -
The most boring part of the Sunday TV schedule
is during your church time.
10 -
You look more relaxed than the
early schedule people who are leaving the building.
Monday, January 15, 2007
BREAKING NEWS: TOP TEN LDS NEW SCRAPBOOK PHRASEOLOGIES
TOP TEN LDS SCRAPBOOKER'S
NEW PHRASEOLOGIES
(Dedicated to the vieve)
by
Bettyanne Bruin
1 -
Scrapbooker's new swear word:
What the scrapbook is going on here?
2 -
Fear of scrapbooking:
Scrapbookaphobia
3 -
Medical condition of raw fingers
from scrapbooking too long:
Scrapbookitus
4 -
Person who is addicted to scrapbooking:
Scrapbookaholic
5 -
Person who looks too long at
scrapbooking items on the internet:
Scrapbook porn
6 -
The official removal of scrapbooking from your life:
A scrapbookectomy
7 -
The incredible stress relief
found as a result of scrapbooking:
Scrapbook therapy
8 -
Really great scrapbooking:
Scrapbookelicious!
9 -
Disorder that comes as a result of
inability to scrapbook:
Post Traumatic Scrapbook Disorder
10 -
Place where all scrapbookers believe they will go
after this life is over:
Scrapbook Heaven
NEW PHRASEOLOGIES
(Dedicated to the vieve)
by
Bettyanne Bruin
1 -
Scrapbooker's new swear word:
What the scrapbook is going on here?
2 -
Fear of scrapbooking:
Scrapbookaphobia
3 -
Medical condition of raw fingers
from scrapbooking too long:
Scrapbookitus
4 -
Person who is addicted to scrapbooking:
Scrapbookaholic
5 -
Person who looks too long at
scrapbooking items on the internet:
Scrapbook porn
6 -
The official removal of scrapbooking from your life:
A scrapbookectomy
7 -
The incredible stress relief
found as a result of scrapbooking:
Scrapbook therapy
8 -
Really great scrapbooking:
Scrapbookelicious!
9 -
Disorder that comes as a result of
inability to scrapbook:
Post Traumatic Scrapbook Disorder
10 -
Place where all scrapbookers believe they will go
after this life is over:
Scrapbook Heaven
Tuesday, January 09, 2007
BREAKING NEWS: TOP TEN LDS LICENSE PLATE FRAMES
BREAKING NEWS: TOP TEN LDS LICENSE FRAMES:
DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF...
by Bettyanne Bruin
DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF...
by Bettyanne Bruin
1:
DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF CHOCOLATE
2:
DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF DIET COKE
3.
DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF CHILDREN
4:
DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF THE SCRIPTURES
5:
DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF PRAYER
6:
DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF CHOOSING THE RIGHT
7.
DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF MY ANCESTORS
8.
DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF SCRAPBOOKING
9.
DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF TEN SCOUTS
10.
DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF
PREPARING MY SUNDAY SCHOOL LESSON
DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF CHOCOLATE
2:
DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF DIET COKE
3.
DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF CHILDREN
4:
DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF THE SCRIPTURES
5:
DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF PRAYER
6:
DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF CHOOSING THE RIGHT
7.
DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF MY ANCESTORS
8.
DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF SCRAPBOOKING
9.
DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF TEN SCOUTS
10.
DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF
PREPARING MY SUNDAY SCHOOL LESSON
Wednesday, January 03, 2007
Wednesday, November 29, 2006
I’m still trying to get my blog up and running. My computer will not allow me to blog BECAUSE IT’S BRAND NEW! (The caps on that comment will make sense after you read my latest entry posted below). But, anyway, I hope everyone had a Happy Thanksgiving.
Top Ten Things LDS People Love to Brag/Whine About:
1 – It’s so horrible, I HAVE WRITTEN IN MY JOURNAL EVERY DAY SINCE 1962 and I can’t find the kind of journal books I like to write in any more.
2 – I am sooooo tired. I have just canned 40 JARS OF PEACHES. I can’t believe I could be so stupid to ever think I could do such a thing.
3 – Can you believe how much tithing we pay? I mean LAST YEAR ALONE I PAID $20,000 IN TITHING!
4 – I love my Young Women’s calling, even though I had to STAY UP ALL NIGHT to make twenty pairs of pajama bottoms for every girl that’s going to camp. Can you believe that? We’ve got twenty girls going to camp!
5 – This week I HAVE to teach Gospel Doctrine, plus give a talk in Sacrament Meeting and say a prayer in RS/PH. I sure hope I don’t get laryngitis!
6 – I can’t believe how much money I spend on stupid little postage stamps each month. WRITING 10 MISSIONARIES can actually be expensive!
7 – Feel how heavy this scripture bag is. BY THE TIME I BRING MY SCRIPTURES AND ALL OF THE SUPPORTIVE MATERIAL I READ EACH WEEK FOR THE CLASSES I ATTEND, this thing weighs about 10 pounds! No wonder I have back problems.
8 – WE HAVE SO MUCH FOOD STORAGE that we’re thinking about BUILDING A NEW GARAGE. It’s amazing how much food storage a family needs WHEN A FAMILY’S REALLY PREPARED.
9 – It’s amazing how many bruises I get each week playing basketball. I DIDN’T EVEN GET THIS MANY WHEN I PLAYED FOR OKLAHOMA STATE!
10 – I had so many dishes to do after Thanksgiving BECAUSE WE HAVE SUCH A LARGE FAMILY!!!
Top Ten Things LDS People Love to Brag/Whine About:
1 – It’s so horrible, I HAVE WRITTEN IN MY JOURNAL EVERY DAY SINCE 1962 and I can’t find the kind of journal books I like to write in any more.
2 – I am sooooo tired. I have just canned 40 JARS OF PEACHES. I can’t believe I could be so stupid to ever think I could do such a thing.
3 – Can you believe how much tithing we pay? I mean LAST YEAR ALONE I PAID $20,000 IN TITHING!
4 – I love my Young Women’s calling, even though I had to STAY UP ALL NIGHT to make twenty pairs of pajama bottoms for every girl that’s going to camp. Can you believe that? We’ve got twenty girls going to camp!
5 – This week I HAVE to teach Gospel Doctrine, plus give a talk in Sacrament Meeting and say a prayer in RS/PH. I sure hope I don’t get laryngitis!
6 – I can’t believe how much money I spend on stupid little postage stamps each month. WRITING 10 MISSIONARIES can actually be expensive!
7 – Feel how heavy this scripture bag is. BY THE TIME I BRING MY SCRIPTURES AND ALL OF THE SUPPORTIVE MATERIAL I READ EACH WEEK FOR THE CLASSES I ATTEND, this thing weighs about 10 pounds! No wonder I have back problems.
8 – WE HAVE SO MUCH FOOD STORAGE that we’re thinking about BUILDING A NEW GARAGE. It’s amazing how much food storage a family needs WHEN A FAMILY’S REALLY PREPARED.
9 – It’s amazing how many bruises I get each week playing basketball. I DIDN’T EVEN GET THIS MANY WHEN I PLAYED FOR OKLAHOMA STATE!
10 – I had so many dishes to do after Thanksgiving BECAUSE WE HAVE SUCH A LARGE FAMILY!!!
Tuesday, October 24, 2006
SUNDAY SCHOOL BREAKING NEWS: TOP TEN THINGS LDS PEOPLE THINK ABOUT DURING SUNDAY SCHOOL CLASS
Top Ten Things LDS People
Think About During
Sunday School Class:
(By Bettyanne Bruin)
1 – How long the teacher spent preparing the lesson.
2 – How much the teacher’s outfit may have cost
and where he or she bought it.
3 – What they’re going to have for lunch
and if they’re out of bread.
4 – Who’s winning the NFL game.
5 – What are the chances of really making it
into the Celestial kingdom.
6 – Who, in the class, might have committed
the biggest sin during the week and what it was.
7 – Who sets up the chairs
and how often do they clean them
8 – What is that spot on the floor from?
9 – Where are we, in the order of the signs
of the last days, and how long do we have
before the Second Coming really arrives?
10 – Why did they decide to wallpaper this room blue?
Think About During
Sunday School Class:
(By Bettyanne Bruin)
1 – How long the teacher spent preparing the lesson.
2 – How much the teacher’s outfit may have cost
and where he or she bought it.
3 – What they’re going to have for lunch
and if they’re out of bread.
4 – Who’s winning the NFL game.
5 – What are the chances of really making it
into the Celestial kingdom.
6 – Who, in the class, might have committed
the biggest sin during the week and what it was.
7 – Who sets up the chairs
and how often do they clean them
8 – What is that spot on the floor from?
9 – Where are we, in the order of the signs
of the last days, and how long do we have
before the Second Coming really arrives?
10 – Why did they decide to wallpaper this room blue?
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
FAMILY HOME EVENING BREAKING NEWS: OFFICIAL FAMILY HOME EVENING ASSIGNMENTS
OFFICIAL FAMILY HOME EVENING ASSIGNMENTS
By Bettyanne Bruin
1 – FHE Opening Prayer
2 – FHE Lesson
3 – FHE Closing Prayer
4 – FHE Refreshments
5 - FHE Referee/Mediator
6 – FHE Phone Monitor
7 – FHE Official Timekeeper
8 – FHE Remote Control Hider
9 – FHE Activity Emergency Medical Technician
10 – FHE Keep-the-Family-Awake Specialist
By Bettyanne Bruin
1 – FHE Opening Prayer
2 – FHE Lesson
3 – FHE Closing Prayer
4 – FHE Refreshments
5 - FHE Referee/Mediator
6 – FHE Phone Monitor
7 – FHE Official Timekeeper
8 – FHE Remote Control Hider
9 – FHE Activity Emergency Medical Technician
10 – FHE Keep-the-Family-Awake Specialist
Thursday, October 05, 2006
COLUMBUS BREAKING NEWS: TOP TEN LDS DISCOVERIES
COLUMBUS BREAKING NEWS:
TOP TEN LDS DISCOVERIES
(By Bettyanne Bruin)
1 - A lot can be accomplished on the last day of the month.
2 - Getting hit by a folding chair, during a basketball game, really hurts.
3 - There is no such thing as a good looking ancestor.
4 - Cheerios are just as good eaten dry.
5 - Refreshments can make any event a success.
6 - Scrapbooking costs as much as a home mortgage
7 - Scouting is only for the completely insane.
8 - Sunday School is mostly intended to keep Mormons from breaking the Sabbath.
9 – Ten kids in one room for two hours can actually cause germs to grow.
10 – Certain male tones, sustained long enough, can cause anyone to fall asleep
TOP TEN LDS DISCOVERIES
(By Bettyanne Bruin)
1 - A lot can be accomplished on the last day of the month.
2 - Getting hit by a folding chair, during a basketball game, really hurts.
3 - There is no such thing as a good looking ancestor.
4 - Cheerios are just as good eaten dry.
5 - Refreshments can make any event a success.
6 - Scrapbooking costs as much as a home mortgage
7 - Scouting is only for the completely insane.
8 - Sunday School is mostly intended to keep Mormons from breaking the Sabbath.
9 – Ten kids in one room for two hours can actually cause germs to grow.
10 – Certain male tones, sustained long enough, can cause anyone to fall asleep
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