Top Things Never Before Said in Response to Being Called as the Next Ward Gospel Doctrine Teacher:
(By Bettyanne Bruin)
1 – I guess this means I have to start coming back to church, right?
2 - But I really don’t know anything about the Bible or the Book of Narmon.
3 - I want you to know, Bishop, that I’ve been anticipating this job for a very long time because of my incredible depth of knowledge and unbelievable scriptural insight that has helped me far exceed everyone else in the Ward around me when it comes to correct gospel doctrine.
4 – Yes, I’d certainly be willing to try this… the day after I kick my smoking habit.
5 – But, I just heard on the news this morning that they were doing away with Sunday School.
6 – Teaching the doctrine is not what I have a hard time with, it’s, WHAT AM I GOING TO WEAR?
7 – Oh yes! I just got Power Point and can’t wait to use it.
8 – Sure. Now, this is the class for investigators, right?
