by
Bettyanne Bruin
I'm not sure what the disease is called, but I think I have it. Weird thing is, I always have had this disease. Without question, nine times out of ten, whenever I see someone, anyone, I don't see them for who they really are, physically. I always see them for who they look like. And I believe I've gotten pretty good at pegging a die-hard Jack Nicholson, Mickey Rooney, and a close George Clooney in past and current wards. Through my years of identity savantness, I have found most of the characters from the Wizard of Oz, the genie from Alladin, Ronald McDonald and Bozo; you name it, I've found it. This became quite the craze with my kids and actually helped them be more reverent in Sacrament meeting, as we sat there, through the years, pegging people:
1 -
Former Bishop: Genie from Alladin,
he had the upside down mouth/smile and the eyes.
2 -
Former Relief Society chorister: cowardly lion
(mostly for the hair and the wrinkles around her eyes);
former Activities chair (a woman): tin woodsman
(her shiny make-up and gray funnel hair);
former magazine rep: scarecrow
(skinny guy with a skinny face and the exact same mouth).
3 -
Former chorister (a woman): Ronald McDonald
(total red hair worn just the same as Ronald. Drives a bright red car. );
the interesting thing here is she's married to Bozo
(obviously a bald guy, except for the toilet-seat-
white-hair wrapped around his head).
Very strange.
4 -
Not one, but two men: raccoons.
(Both had heavy foreheads that hung way over their eyes with a unibrow)
5 -
Older man,
was never sure what he did in the ward, wandered alot,
but he looked just like a big huge owl.
(Heaviest forehead ever seen with one gigantic unibrow
and a very prominent nose between two big eyes.)
I always wondered what he looked like as a kid
and could only figure he HAD to have looked like an owl then too.
No, his wife did not look like a bird.
Well, now that I think about it, maybe, sort of, but just a plain bird.
6.
Michael Jackson look-a-like:
this one my daughter picked out and it wasn't at church.
She was driving along I-15,
passed this woman in our ward and, bingo, it hit her.
She called to tell me.
We were very excited to add her to the list.
(After skin pigmentation altering in the Diana Ross category.)
7 -
Counselor in the Relief Society Presidency:
From the Dick Van Dyke show,
Mary Tyler Moore's (Laura Petrie) neighbor,
Millie Helper (husband Jerry).
How creepy for this person to surface
so many years after shows been canceled.
(Very short. Pursed lips with wide eyes. Scoots around.)
8 -
Former chorister: German nutcracker.
(Always stood so straight with shorter arms than normal
that he always stuck straight out to conduct.)
Awesomest look-a-like ever!
9 -
Counselor in the Bishopric:
Munchkin from the wizard of Oz.
(Short with shiny, puffy cheeks, balding and always smiling.)
Looks even more like a munchkin when he cries
and he cries, at the pulpit, over everything.
10 -
High Councilman:
Cabbage patch kid:
(Nice guy, but yee-ouch! Where do I start?
Bald, eyes that sit right on top of his way red, puffy cheeks.
I've always wanted to bump into him doing yard work,
to see if when he wears a T-shirt if part of his belly shows.)
K, so, who do you have in your Ward that looks like someone famous?
Should there be an annual LDS look-a-like contest?
Awesome!
Former Bishop: Genie from Alladin,
he had the upside down mouth/smile and the eyes.
2 -
Former Relief Society chorister: cowardly lion
(mostly for the hair and the wrinkles around her eyes);
former Activities chair (a woman): tin woodsman
(her shiny make-up and gray funnel hair);
former magazine rep: scarecrow
(skinny guy with a skinny face and the exact same mouth).
3 -
Former chorister (a woman): Ronald McDonald
(total red hair worn just the same as Ronald. Drives a bright red car. );
the interesting thing here is she's married to Bozo
(obviously a bald guy, except for the toilet-seat-
white-hair wrapped around his head).
Very strange.
4 -
Not one, but two men: raccoons.
(Both had heavy foreheads that hung way over their eyes with a unibrow)
5 -
Older man,
was never sure what he did in the ward, wandered alot,
but he looked just like a big huge owl.
(Heaviest forehead ever seen with one gigantic unibrow
and a very prominent nose between two big eyes.)
I always wondered what he looked like as a kid
and could only figure he HAD to have looked like an owl then too.
No, his wife did not look like a bird.
Well, now that I think about it, maybe, sort of, but just a plain bird.
6.
Michael Jackson look-a-like:
this one my daughter picked out and it wasn't at church.
She was driving along I-15,
passed this woman in our ward and, bingo, it hit her.
She called to tell me.
We were very excited to add her to the list.
(After skin pigmentation altering in the Diana Ross category.)
7 -
Counselor in the Relief Society Presidency:
From the Dick Van Dyke show,
Mary Tyler Moore's (Laura Petrie) neighbor,
Millie Helper (husband Jerry).
How creepy for this person to surface
so many years after shows been canceled.
(Very short. Pursed lips with wide eyes. Scoots around.)
8 -
Former chorister: German nutcracker.
(Always stood so straight with shorter arms than normal
that he always stuck straight out to conduct.)
Awesomest look-a-like ever!
9 -
Counselor in the Bishopric:
Munchkin from the wizard of Oz.
(Short with shiny, puffy cheeks, balding and always smiling.)
Looks even more like a munchkin when he cries
and he cries, at the pulpit, over everything.
10 -
High Councilman:
Cabbage patch kid:
(Nice guy, but yee-ouch! Where do I start?
Bald, eyes that sit right on top of his way red, puffy cheeks.
I've always wanted to bump into him doing yard work,
to see if when he wears a T-shirt if part of his belly shows.)
K, so, who do you have in your Ward that looks like someone famous?
Should there be an annual LDS look-a-like contest?
Awesome!
