COMEDY CENTRAL BREAKING NEWS: LDS JOKES

LDS JOKES:
(By Bettyanne Bruin)


What do you call a Primary child who’s been gagged and handcuffed?

Reverent.

What does it mean when a LDS home is void of chocolate?

It’s time to go out and buy more.

Why do only 10% of Mormons sing in church?

Because if they all did, it wouldn’t be called singing.

Why do Mormon men and women marry?

Because there must be opposition in all things.

How is a Relief Society sister like Jello?

She’s sweet, her life is colorful and the longer she sits the thicker around the middle she gets.

How does a High Priest exercise his biceps?

By holding his head up while sleeping in church.

What does every worthy young Mormon man hope to get out of a service project?

Food.

How do Mormons plan for the future?

By purchasing two cases of Coke instead of one.