Friday, August 07, 2020





Library of crazy family clip library library png files ...



Benefits of Home-based Church

1.

Half-size slices of bread.

2.

Full-size glasses of water.

3.

Lessons end when you feel like it.

4.

TV on in the background.

5.

Shorts allowed.

6.

Laying down? No problem.

7.

Snacks appropriate, including popcorn, bubble gum and pop rocks.

8.

Animals welcome.

9. 

You can change seats if you don’t like the one you have.

10. 

Everyone is actually kind of happy.


The Gospel and family, a wonderful combination!


Tuesday, August 04, 2020


Seventh Archives - Reservoir Church
  

Things I Miss Most Now That We're Not Going To Church

Because of Coronavirus


  • Sitting in my same seat. I miss my cold, hard folding chair in the back.

  • My most scrumptious nap, My weeks are just not the same without them.

  • My favoritist moment of sneaking Mentos out of my purse and slipping them into my mouth like it’s the most dangerous move ever.

  • Hearing someone’s phone go off during the sacrament and seeing them scramble to turn it off, like it's a ticking time bomb.

  • Seeing faithful members carry in treats to their classes where there’s not supposed to be any treats.

  • Going home and having to recover from church because I keep hearing member after member say how much they are loved from above because they were saved from harm while I sit there with a son-in-law and two grandchildren who died in a plane accident.

  • Kids being hauled out of the chapel by their parents.

  • Staring at the old man with the died hair sitting next to his old lady with the waist long died blonde hair and the world’s worst lip collagen injections and wondering if they are a first marriage or a second and how he gets away with wearing slippers with his suit. 

  • The relief I was still feeling after the second block, knowing there was no third one.

  • Being able to see, recognize and feel so close to so many people simply by seeing the backs of their heads during Sacrament meeting.

Monday, May 13, 2019

I Like Me Better When I'm With You

Image may contain: 12 people, outdoor

Tuesday, January 22, 2019









Top Ten Things to Say Goodbye to Now that We’re on the Two-hour Block:

1. 
No more time to go home 
and “check on the roast” during Sunday School.

2. 
No more reason to complain 
that church is just way too long.

3. 
No more time for 
long-winded comments in church classes.  

4. 
No more need for 
the Second Counselor in the Sunday School presidency 
to ring the 5-minute buzzer.

5. 
No more time for long spaces of time between testimonies. 

6. 
No more time for long prayers.

7. 
No more time for long testimonies or lengthy high council talks.

8. 
No more time for sleeping in meetings.

9. 
No more Happy Minute in Relief Society.

10. 
No more welcoming visitors.

Tuesday, August 16, 2016


                                                       Top Ten Mormon Phelps Faces







1 - When you thought were going on a foreign mission

but get called to Idaho.









                             2 - When you thought you paid a full tithing but came up $1k short.







                       3- When you get called as Ward Mission Leader (or Nursery Leader or Scoutmaster). 







                              4 - When Sacrament meeting goes more than 20 minutes over.







                                         5 - When, right after fixing the best breakfast ever,

                                                         you remember it's Fast Sunday.







                                  6 - When a visiting family steals "your family's" pew in the chapel.







7- When you finally get to the food line at the Ward dinner

and there's no more funeral potatoes left.





                                         8- When the parking lot's full at Stake Conference

                                                       so you have to park up the street.





                                                    9 - When the U. of U. beats BYU



                                  

                                


           10 - When you realize you have a meeting at the same time as the Super Bowl.